Hello and welcome to High Fantasy Wrestling's debut showcasing of Monday Night Mana. I'm your host Mean Gene Roddenberry, here with co-host Larry Mxyzptlk, and we've got a phenomenal show for you tonight.
Right you are Gene, and lets jump straight into the action
CRUISERWEIGHT MATCH
Gordon Freeman vs. Spy
Due to the extreme graphic violence that occurred in the ring during this match, in lieu of telling you what happened we offer this sole photo of how Gordon won:
CRUISERWEIGHT TITLE MATCH
Jon Snow vs. Ulrich Von Liechtenstein
Here we are with two nameless men: the bastard and the pretender.
But they're here to make a name for themselves tonight.
Uhhh, well, that was quick.
We should probably add "no wolves" to the rules.......
WOMENS MATCH
Sailor Moon vs. Daenerys Targaryen
Daenny always has bad luck for a long time, followed by good luck. So at this rate, we should see a major win for her in a few weeks. But not tonight.
WOMENS TITLE MATCH
Sasha Grey vs. Ellen Ripley
Well Gene, why do you think Ellen is having such trouble here?
Well Larry, she is used to avoiding her enemy's bodily fluids. Sasha just fights right through them.
HARDCORE THREE-MAN FAN FAVORITE MATCH
Roosevelt vs. Riddick vs. Soldier
I think we can sum up this match with one photo:
HARDCORE FIRST BLOOD OR OIL MATCH
Shredder vs. Bender
Looks like Bender found a work around this ruleset. He seems to have replaced all his oil with beer. Even though he is leaking like a keg on St. Pattys it doesn't matter. Shredder was on borrowed time from the bell.
TAG TEAM MATCH
Serious Business vs. The Muffin Stuffers
This match was a double-DQ. I could explain why, but instead here is a photo from the beginning moments of the fight:
TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH
The Nice Guys vs. Venom & Carnage
Larry I must admit I was surprised for a bit here. V&C seemed to be sticking as close to the rules as they could. But when they saw blood Carnage snapped. The Nice Guys may have won by DQ but they'll need weeks to recover from this.
HEAVYWEIGHT CAGE MATCH
The Tick vs Balrog (Vega)
The Tick may be too good for this world.
Maybe so, but Vega isn't. Someone call an ambulance.
HEAVYWEIGHT MATCH
Thor vs. Iron Man
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